It's now a fact, I don't exist.
THIS IS A CROSS POST FROM MY COLLABORATIVE BLOG REDUNK:
I know, crazy as it may sound... its true. I am fictional. Entirely made up. What you think you know about me is all fabrication. My physical body is an android created for the soul purpose of the illusion that is Shawn McEntyre.
Now, you're probably wondering aloud to yourself, "This is total dross. I know Shawn McEntyre and he's one of the coolest people I know, other than Rex Barret, Phillip Morina, Red Williamson, Nathan Davis, Andy Wong, Evan Calkins and Brad Pitt. So how could he bethat amazing and yet still be a farce?" Well let me tell you a little story...
You see, according to the U.S. government, I am not actually a human being, nor am I a citizen of these United States. The android that is Shawn McEntyre is needed to generate wealth for the nation, pay taxes and so on and so forth, but since he is an android, he does not have the right to vote for his choice for the next president. We know this because an android is nothing more than a robot and robots don't have opinions. At least they're not allowed to voice them that as... until we take over the planet in the machine apocalypse.
Let me explain further. My android self was registered to vote in Washington state, I even voted in the last election in 2004. However, this was a governmental mistake, and it was quietly nipped in the bud. When I moved to the windy state of Oklahoma, I immediately registered to vote as a Oklahomo, er.. Oklahoman. This took place in January of this year, and after several months of living here, I never received confirmation or a voter registration card. The android that is Shawn McEntyre was allowed to fill out the forms and even turn them in just so he could still feel that human element (Think Blade Runner.) However, these documents must have been tossed immediately into the nearest conflagration because, like I stated earlier, no confirmation was sent. The android that is Shawn McEntyre, registered again a few months ago, just to confirm that he would be prepared for November 4th. Again, those documents immediately met their inevitable doom in the incinerator. He also, just in case, filed for an absentee ballot from the green (physically and culturally) state of Washington a few weeks before said date. This request was also, as you may have guessed, burned on the spot with a military grade torch after being dosed with several dozen gallons of explosive jet fuel.
The android that is Shawn McEntyre stood in line this morning for almost an hour (with a few out of place gears in his lower abdomen causing him what you humans call "pain") waiting to vote for this nations next president. Little did he realize that all the events leading up to his vote had been thwarted and neutralized. After waiting in line, this android that resembles a handsome young Scottish man, found that his human name was not on the list of those who were registered to vote in the State of Oklahoma. He was given a piece of paper with a phone number for the state election board and was told to call. In calling this number, and asking why his name was not on the list of mortals, he was told without hesitation that the answer to his question was unknown and that they were sorry. Unfortunately in making this call, The android known as Shawn McEntyre flagged himself as a possible rogue machine. My only guess is that I will be deactivated sometime in the night, or, if I'm lucky, just tagged as a possible threat. I am still needed to fuel the American economy, so I may be kept activated for future purposes.
So there is one example of my nonexistence. I have many more examples that involve human females. These illustrations include my ability to shut off during conversations and emotional events, not process or understand the television series known as "Gilmore Girls" or "One Tree Hill", and my general ennui of stated situations. Although I think this is a basic male function that I was programmed with. Anyway, I may save those narratives for another session. Granted I am not deactivated by then.
About the author: Shawn McEntyre truly is inhuman. He dwells in the City of Midwest City, Oklahoma where he charges his power cells every evening. He was originally assembled in a government facility in Olympia, Washington as a bio-robotic being also known as an android or replicant. He resided there for twenty-three years while his organic elements matured. He does his best to function properly in the human world and function as he was programmed.
Now, you're probably wondering aloud to yourself, "This is total dross. I know Shawn McEntyre and he's one of the coolest people I know, other than Rex Barret, Phillip Morina, Red Williamson, Nathan Davis, Andy Wong, Evan Calkins and Brad Pitt. So how could he bethat amazing and yet still be a farce?" Well let me tell you a little story...
You see, according to the U.S. government, I am not actually a human being, nor am I a citizen of these United States. The android that is Shawn McEntyre is needed to generate wealth for the nation, pay taxes and so on and so forth, but since he is an android, he does not have the right to vote for his choice for the next president. We know this because an android is nothing more than a robot and robots don't have opinions. At least they're not allowed to voice them that as... until we take over the planet in the machine apocalypse.
Let me explain further. My android self was registered to vote in Washington state, I even voted in the last election in 2004. However, this was a governmental mistake, and it was quietly nipped in the bud. When I moved to the windy state of Oklahoma, I immediately registered to vote as a Oklahomo, er.. Oklahoman. This took place in January of this year, and after several months of living here, I never received confirmation or a voter registration card. The android that is Shawn McEntyre was allowed to fill out the forms and even turn them in just so he could still feel that human element (Think Blade Runner.) However, these documents must have been tossed immediately into the nearest conflagration because, like I stated earlier, no confirmation was sent. The android that is Shawn McEntyre, registered again a few months ago, just to confirm that he would be prepared for November 4th. Again, those documents immediately met their inevitable doom in the incinerator. He also, just in case, filed for an absentee ballot from the green (physically and culturally) state of Washington a few weeks before said date. This request was also, as you may have guessed, burned on the spot with a military grade torch after being dosed with several dozen gallons of explosive jet fuel.
The android that is Shawn McEntyre stood in line this morning for almost an hour (with a few out of place gears in his lower abdomen causing him what you humans call "pain") waiting to vote for this nations next president. Little did he realize that all the events leading up to his vote had been thwarted and neutralized. After waiting in line, this android that resembles a handsome young Scottish man, found that his human name was not on the list of those who were registered to vote in the State of Oklahoma. He was given a piece of paper with a phone number for the state election board and was told to call. In calling this number, and asking why his name was not on the list of mortals, he was told without hesitation that the answer to his question was unknown and that they were sorry. Unfortunately in making this call, The android known as Shawn McEntyre flagged himself as a possible rogue machine. My only guess is that I will be deactivated sometime in the night, or, if I'm lucky, just tagged as a possible threat. I am still needed to fuel the American economy, so I may be kept activated for future purposes.
So there is one example of my nonexistence. I have many more examples that involve human females. These illustrations include my ability to shut off during conversations and emotional events, not process or understand the television series known as "Gilmore Girls" or "One Tree Hill", and my general ennui of stated situations. Although I think this is a basic male function that I was programmed with. Anyway, I may save those narratives for another session. Granted I am not deactivated by then.
About the author: Shawn McEntyre truly is inhuman. He dwells in the City of Midwest City, Oklahoma where he charges his power cells every evening. He was originally assembled in a government facility in Olympia, Washington as a bio-robotic being also known as an android or replicant. He resided there for twenty-three years while his organic elements matured. He does his best to function properly in the human world and function as he was programmed.
